My Husband and I are going on our 9th year of marriage and out 11th year of being together. Now if you do the math you will quickly find out I was a child bride. Ok not really but at 21 when I thought I had life all figured out I can say without a doubt I literally had no idea what I was doing. #Truth! Now fast forwards 9 years I can say that marriage is hard work. We shot a wedding a couple months back where the best man said that you should get a paycheque for being married. No before your mind starts heading straight for the gutter, what he really meant was that if you don’t show up to your job you don’t get paid. If you don’t put in the effort you won’t get paid and same goes for your marriage. If you don’t show up for your marriage you won’t last long. If you don’t put in the effort your marriage won’t be as strong as you want or wish it to be. Now don’t get me wrong I am by no means a relationship guru, but what I do know is taking time for each other admit the craziness of everyday life is important. This is why I truly believe once you are married you need to celebrate your wedding anniversaries.
Think of it this way, in todays day and age being married 10+ years is unusual and quite the feat. The divorce rate is 40-50% in North America which is astounding. And so these days I believe celebrating one’s anniversary must never be overlooked, as it reinforces the fact that your marriage is a priority. An anniversary celebration also allows you to pull back from your daily grind and relive a moment that changed your life forever. I heard it said that anyone can pull out all the stops on their wedding day. But when a couple makes it to 10 or 20 or 60 years of marriage, well, now that’s something that really needs celebrating. Even if things aren’t perfect or the way you had hoped they would be, staying together for another year deserves a celebration.
No matter if you celebrate in a big lavish way with a trip, a party or in a smaller way like dinner out or out to a movie it gives you a chance to reconnect as a couple. Sometimes life can feel as if you are downing under all the commitments but by stopping and planning some time just the tow of you gives you the chance to reconnect and realign your priorities in your marriage.
My hubby are in the midst of a **cough, cough** 7 year renovation and some times it feel like we haven’t accomplished anything over those 7 years until we start looking back. Its only then you realize how far you have come. This is the same for your relationship, if you take the time on your anniversary to look back at the last year or even last couple of years you can reflect on how far you have come and all the amazing things that have happened the last years.
I was curious if others felt the same so I reach out to the Facebook world and I LOVEd all the response I got from everyone. Most people were in favour of celebrating but most would plan a small dinner out or at the very least some kid free time. Check out some of the awesome responses I got below:
“My hubby and I have been married almost 19 years. We do card exchange and something for a gift. We have bought patio furniture, concerts, dinners out, big trips (Fiji for our 10th, i didn’t know until we checked in at airport!), cruises. We try to create memories for us to savor later. The really big big thing we do every single year on our anniversary, is to take our wedding bands off and state a reason that we love being together and replace the rings on our fingers (he puts my ring on my hand as he speaks and I put his on as I speak.)”
“We just make sure that during around that time cause sometimes life gets busy, we go and doing something that we may not have time to do anymore. Like now with our son, we are happy just going to our fav restaurant and then a movie. We are huge movie nerds.”
“Every year of marriage is worth celebrating in a world full of divorce! We have always made it a priority to go away for a night (sometimes two). Part of it may be that we had kids so quickly after marriage that getting away helps us to really be able to focus on and enjoy each other. Usually it’s just Canmore or somewhere not too far.”
“33+ years No gifts just time/making memories. Simplicity. That’s the most precious thing we can give each other. In the early years we had different more lofty expectations and were often disappointed when we didn’t meet them for the other. Then kids came and it was a nod and acknowledgement across a morning cup of coffee. lol and even that was an effort. Love is a hard fought battle that fewer and fewer survive through let alone thrive in the midst of the chaos. In these years we’re thriving because of the experience. And it’s the perseverance that’s got us there. ”
Making the time to reconnect and get back to you as a couple pre kids, pre mortgage. pre life will help re centre you as a couple and make sure your both on track for many more happy years to come.
Also a huge shout out to Monica from Red Bloom Photography for capturing us so perfectly on our trip to the Santa Monica Pier!
If your looking for a Wedding Photographer and are in the Calgary, Cochrane, Canmore or Banff area get in touch with me at email@example.com
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